Advice Requested

[kybearfuzz]

Today was a particularly odd day at work. I got a significant amount of work done, got to work with a rather nice bear type for the day, and found out that one of my coworkers has decided to leave and take a new job. The last one was right out of left field, no warning given. Change is inevitable.

I had a conversation with a friend and co-worker today that I would like some advice from the peanut gallery on. During a joking moment, my friend said that she didn't eat "fruit loops" (i.e. she's straight) and didn't understand the gay thing. She also made a face and said "gross". This friend of mine is a very nice person, funny and interesting. I've known her and worked with her for years. She is unaware I'm gay (unless I'm far more obvious than I believe). She and another coworker are discussing having me go out on a blind date with the other's niece.

I'm recently out and have not let everyone in on the big deal yet. This situation is bugging me though and I wouldn't mind a few opinions on how to handle it. My friend is clearly closed-minded in regards to gay people and I don't know if she'd socialize with me if she knew. My head say "who cares?", but my gut doesn't feel that way. The situations are starting to form when people are going start asking why I don't want to go out with the cute girl or the nice girl junk. The obvious answer is to tell everyone and it would stop, but I don't want a situation like this to be the reason I come out to questionable people.

Any solicited opinions out there?

Comments

[queensheba.livejournal.com]

Hmmmm. Faced with her "gay people are icky" comments, I might come right out and say something like "Susie, you might be surprised how many gay people you actually know," - not in a condescending or mean way, but just to put the thought into her head. She might not associate it with *you,* but she might realize just a little bit that you can't tell about someone's sexuality just by looking. Or, you could say "Hmmm, I don't really feel that way; I have some gay friends I care very much about," or whatever. That lets her know that you're not comfortable with closed-minded attitudes without being really preachy and turning her off altogether. With regards to the fixing-up-with-the-niece situation, you could say something like, "Thanks for thinking of me, Mary, but I'm really not interested in dating any new women right now,". She *might* get the hint, and if not, you're at least being honest and gracious.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Hmmm... direct, but subtle. I like it. Thanks, your Majesty :)