Another teenage admirer...

[kybearfuzz]

First, big birthday hugs to mat_t! Hope it was a great one! Now today's drama...

It seems I am fated to be hounded by the local gay teen population as a love interest. I was chatted up by another on 411 then to Yahoo. I have no problem chatting with people, but teenagers, even though they are over 18, just makes me feel uncomfortable for the following reasons:

• They could be lying and be younger than they say. I've heard from friends of this happening to them.
  
• They always want to talk about sexual experiences. I kill any conversation quickly after that.
  
• Mature 18 year olds are rare. They do exist, I know a young LJ'er (who looks much older) who is an great guy, incredibly mature for his age.
  
• They always say "I like older men"... let me get my walker and talk about how those young whipper-snappers are ruining America with their loud hippie music and long hair... seeing how they are 18, that makes all men older men...
  
• They always get defensive when you try to let them down easy. Then you have to become a jerk.

I do admit that I feel bad being that way with them. I remember what it was like to be 18 and interested. They seem to have the guts to be out and date, unlike me at the time. Am I overly paranoid here, they could be looking for just friends, but they seem to be out for more?

Comments

[jprtoronto.livejournal.com]

maybe they are confusing you with that other Mark -- the congressman :)

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Oh dear.. you may be right! Oh wait, I'm not a Republican or a bloated white idiot pedophile.... How can they get me confused with him?

[ciddyguy.livejournal.com]

I think with it being so easy to be out of the closet and such these days and at younger ages and add to the fact the social standards, or the lack there of in learning the art of discression, I think many kids just don't know how they may be coming across to folks.

Just jumping in and blurting out, Hi, I like older men... or I did such and such for sex last night I don't think so. I'm with you there. There is a way to converse, but that's not it and it's rude and insulting to assume as such when initiaating a conversation.

[mat-t.livejournal.com]

Thanks cutie :) *hugs back*

Yeah, I've had that problem occasionally with the 18-20 year old set. You're right, they get REALLY defensive when you turn 'em down.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Being an ass to them isn't easy, but they don't seem to get it that I'm not interested.

[mat-t.livejournal.com]

I know just what you mean. They usually start arguing that you should be interested because they're mature for their age. I usually tell them that if they need to proclaim that they're mature repeatedly, then they're not. It usually gets to where you have to be a jerk to get rid of them.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Oh I'm always careful of the age thing...

[furrbear.livejournal.com]

I agree about that one LJer. Not only does he look older, he is MUCH more mature than an average late teen.

I've chatted off and on with a few teenage pre-bears. I always start off with the admonition that I'm not comfortable discussing sex with someone that young, but I'll freely discuss anything else.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Well, maybe I'll be a bit nicer to the next one, as long as I drop the hint that sex is out.

[boobooirl.livejournal.com]

I'd be very uncomfortable as well if an 18 yr old came on to me (not that it's happened more than once, seeing as I don't look much older myself). But if they want to play with the grown ups, then they also have to learn to take a "no" like a grown up.

As for being paranoid about the issue?
Have a look in the mirror, Mark. Of course they are looking for more! :)

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

You're too good to me handsome.. :)

[fjdbear.livejournal.com]

I don't do young. Period. On the bright side there's a certain age you get to when they don't bother you anymore. It's like a thresh-hold where you're "just too old". Thank gawd.

And it's not so much easier to come out of the closet these days. There's just more avenues to be a pain in the ass in, i.e., chat rooms, blogs, cam chat, etc. Which in my opinion easily can lead to cyberstalking with some of these younguns.

[queensheba.livejournal.com]

I thought of you yesterday - when Mike and I were at the wool festival, there was a big burly guy with a beard singing gospel music, and I thought, "Hey, I bet that's the kind of guy Mark likes - that's the kind he's always commenting about." It was kind of funny to think about him that way and at the same time hear him singing so earnestly about Jesus. I'm pretty sure he has no idea he could be a gay sex symbol:)

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

LOL.. he sounds very much like the guys I'm interested in, very handsome I bet.

I have a coworker who thinks he is this grisled old bearded fart... he has no idea how attractive he is to a certain group of gay men :D

[shimbexprovides.livejournal.com]

Observations:

I generally dismiss anyone under 21 out-of-hat because they usually fall into one of the following groups:

a) Looking for a sugar daddy.
b) Sex addicts already filled with cooties.
c) Too immature to understand the difference between a hookup, a friendship, and a relationship.
d) Habitual liars or crapheads out to cause trouble.
e) Not really underage gay boys but actually cops or vigilante pedophile-chasers posing as such.
f) Too stupid to make coherent sentences.
g) Fledgling prostitutes who need to work on their marketing.
h) Uninteresting as crap.

Plus my natural paranoia assumes that whatever group they belong to, they're only targeting me because I'm overweight and older and therefore desperate.

That being said, it's still a nice ego-stroke.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Plus my natural paranoia assumes that whatever group they belong to, they're only targeting me because I'm overweight and older and therefore desperate.

Oh please, I just saw you at PKI and I thought you looked great, hardly overweight! :)

[shimbexprovides.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I like to think of myself as "comfortably winterized."

But from the perspective of most of the little Paris-Hilton-trapped-in-the-body-of-a-twinks who pvt me, I'm a whale.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

LOL.. if you're a whale, what does that make me??? :D

[shimbexprovides.livejournal.com]

Scruffilicious.

[coachbear.livejournal.com]

heya mark
long time no woof
thought i'd say gday

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Hey there handsome. Hope all is well :)

[coachbear.livejournal.com]

apart from losing my ipod
my cashcard -which thankfully i recovered
and this morning misplacing my glasses
all is good LOL
gonna friend ya if thats ok

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Sure!

Sounds like you've had a rough day. Lost and iPod.. ouch!!! :(

[coachbear.livejournal.com]

yeah mark
its been pretty sucky...