1000 Ways to Die

While doing laundry on Sunday I was watching Spike TV and caught several episodes of 1000 Ways to Die. It's like a show about Darwin Award winners, re-inactments of true graphic deaths. Some of them are just bizarre accidents, a one-in-a-million fluke that could happen to anyone, but the best are just people doing the world a favor by bumping themselves off in an extremely stupid way.

Some of the things I've learned include:

• Never use your foot to clear blockage in a wood chipper.
  
• Never try to sword-swallow an umbrella.
  
• Bleach when used to clear a clogged RV toilet can create chlorine gas.
  
• Alcohol should not be consumed via an enema.
  
• Don't play with a latex-clad dominatrix if you're allergic to latex.
  
• Smoking poison sumac is not a substitute for pot.
  
• Snorting fire ants will hurt and kill you.
  
• Tapeworms are not meant for dieting and weight loss.
  
• Your rectum is not a safe place to hide pepper spray from a policeman.
  
• Don't swallow a cue ball on a bet.

... and I haven't even seen all the episodes yet.