On the Telephone

[kybearfuzz]

I have never been a phone chatter. Ever.

When I was a kid, when my sister and brother basically kept our house phone tied up for hours a day, I used marvel at why anyone would enjoy it. And this was back when you were basically tethered to the wall with the cord.

After I got out of the house, it never improved and still holds little fascination for me. I have over 4,000 rollover minutes on my cell phone. The longest I spend on the phone is between a half-hour and an hour, usually talking to my mom or to aceofspace. There have been exceptions when I chatted on the phone with some LJ'ers, but they are few and far between. Even when I'm dating someone, which is a rare thing, I'd rather be with him in person than on the phone with him.

I was chatting online with a guy this weekend and I think I irritated him when I begged off talking with him on the phone. It's not that he's not a great guy and I wouldn't mind hearing his voice, but talking on the phone is just unappealing to me. This is a difficult thing to explain to someone when he doesn't know me personally.

Am I alone in this? Just curious.

Comments

[labeartorycub.livejournal.com]

Nope, you're not alone. I, too, don't really like to talk on the phone for very long, preferring to talk with someone in-person. I wasn't always this way. Many years in tech support have caused me to be more phone adverse.

[pink-halen.livejournal.com]

For those of us who like to talk on the phone the "phonephobic" can prove to be a problem. Some have resorted to only texting. It is hard to text from a land line. But for those of us who don't understand, It is hard to imagine what there is to dislike. Of course, talking face to face is preferable but I often have trouble getting people to agree to that.

So, What's missing? Is it the nonverbal feed back? Is it a hearing problem with the phone service. Do you miss the hot breath? We, in the other camp, just don't understand.

[kybearfuzz.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I'm not sure if I can find the exact issue I have with phone chatting. I've never been comfortable with a receiver to my ear for long periods of time. I get distracted easily as well and my mind will wander.

Those things and all of the small unidentifiable quirks make phone conversing adverse for me.

[ui-tomcat.livejournal.com]

I'm not much of a phone talker either, mostly cuz my hearing is on the poor side but have had to learn to adjust cuz my bf likes to hear my voice every day. lol

[spatts5.livejournal.com]

I'll call you and we can discuss it at length.

I'm not much of a phone person either.

[dewittar.livejournal.com]

I'm with you on this one. My husband and I have always call one another when we're leaving our offices and heading home. He wants to chat. I do not. Just give me the data and I need at the time and we'll talk in depth when we both get home.

I have several LJ-ers that I speak with over the phone but it's a challenge for me. I think it's the lack of visual clues for me. I can't tell when/if they're really engaged and so I become nervous. I'm very much a visual thinker so when I don't have it, I become very self-conscious which kicks in my natural introvert which leads me to say 'bye bye' as soon as possible.

[whitmanschild.livejournal.com]

My dad and brother are the same way. This year, my Dad called me for my birthday, and it was the first time that HE had called ME in at least seven years that I can be sure of, maybe longer. He HATES the phone and everything to do with it.

[dendren.livejournal.com]

I give horrible phone. Sometimes I think I just have ADD or something because I absolutely can not pay attention when on the phone. Texting/IM/online chat I'm fine with, prolly cause I can do other things at the same time, but as soon as I get on the phone I zone out and end up holding a coversation full of "uh-huh", "yep", "ha-ha" and hope I responded appropriately to whatever was just said. It kind of sucks because I would love to be more in touch with folks out in the world but I just truly suck at being a phone chatter.

[itzgid.livejournal.com]

Sung to the tune of the Beatles' "Yesterday":

ADD. My doctor told me I had... Oh, look! A bunny!

Thank you, Eric Schwartz.

[mikiedoggie.livejournal.com]

As I have often joked, even in LJ land, yes, you are one for briefness on the phone. I am actually just like that, I HATE talking on the phone for the most part.

[texwriterbear.livejournal.com]

And I know it comes to such a big surprise that I love talking on the phone! It's never bothered me one bit.

[clintswan.livejournal.com]

nope

me too

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I would prefer speaking face to face ... and though it surprises some people, I'm quite shy about speaking on the phone ... There are exceptions ... I speak to my folks and to Tim every day, though Tim hates the phone more than I do.

However (and it's rare) ... I can be completely engaged with someone over the phone ... I speak often on the phone with erstexman, designerotter and my non-LJ friends Casey, Steve and Stan ... The friendships are close, so there's no stress for me ... I guess what I'm saying is that I'm completely capable on the phone, but don't prefer it.

I don't text or tweet, so the phone is how I communicate. I really get irritated with folks who can't communicate in person and sit at social events texting, focused on their phones. Completely rude!

[designerotter.livejournal.com]

I often wonder how people do the cell-phone thing so frequently and in an extended way. Like you, I've gazillions of rollover minutes (then they disappear and start building up again).
Maybe it's because I'm a shy person at heart and only speak comfortably on the phone with friends I've gotten to know in person. Oddly enough, I'm fine with business and work-related phone conversations - probably because I'm playing a particular role.

[itzgid.livejournal.com]

My dad is the same way. My mother would happily chat for an hour. My dad has a phone tolerance of about 5 minutes. As far as I know, I'm the only exception; after my mom died, while I was still in NY, he called me frequently to chat. Since I've been back, his phone habits are the same as they used to be.

[rixtur.livejournal.com]

I hear ya, this past Oct I attended Disney Gays Days with a bunch of Bear guys whom we all know each other from Facebook. It was a 3 day event and all those guys did was play with their cellphones, weather on line, texting, or chatting. Finally halfway through the second day, I said, "cant you guys put them stupid things away?". They looked at me like I stabbed their mother.

[bigsabu.livejournal.com]

I hate talking on the phone. Abhor it. If I can't see the person I'm talking to, I am distracted and can't concentrate on the conversation. I will do everything in my power to avoid talking on the phone.